Am I Not Enough?” — A Journey Through Faith, Despair, and Healing
Troy William’s book, Am I Not Enough?, is a raw and deeply honest account of faith tested under the heaviest of burdens—and ultimately restored through truth, humility, and renewal of the mind.
After years of hearing well-meaning Christian friends repeat the familiar phrase, “Where God guides, He provides,” Troy and his wife felt called to step out in faith. With seven young children in tow, they moved to Turkey to begin a ministry they believed God had placed on their hearts.
Am I Not Enough by Troy Willams
But soon after arriving, that comforting saying began to unravel.
Hardship followed hardship. Financial despair set in. Prayers seemed to go unanswered, never rising beyond their lips. Letters sent to friends and churches asking for help were met with silence. What once felt like a clear calling now felt like abandonment.
Bitterness took root.
Not only toward people who failed to respond—but toward God Himself.
Troy found himself questioning whether God was present at all. The weight of unmet expectations, exhaustion, and isolation began to crush his spirit. Eventually, the emotional and mental strain reached a breaking point.
It was while Troy lay in an emergency room bed, awaiting transfer to a mental health facility, that an unexpected encounter changed everything.
A man appeared with what Troy describes as a message from God. After delivering it, the man left him with words that would mark a turning point in his life:
“If you will put God back on the throne of your life, and love Him the way you are supposed to love Him, those neurons in your brain will fire right again and you will be healed.”
That moment sparked a journey of deep reflection and transformation.
In Am I Not Enough?, Troy shares his complete story—how he removed God from the throne of his life, how he fell out of love with Him, and how misunderstood promises led to misplaced expectations. He explores what God truly promises to provide, what God desires from His people, and how renewing his understanding of God reshaped not only his faith but his mental and emotional health.
The book also dives into the powerful connection between belief, thought patterns, and healing—how changing his thinking about God allowed his mind to produce the chemicals needed for restoration.
Am I Not Enough? is not a story of easy answers or shallow encouragement. It is a testimony for anyone who has ever felt abandoned, unheard, or spiritually empty—especially those who have faithfully followed God and still found themselves in the wilderness.
Ultimately, it is a story of coming home—placing God back where He belongs, rediscovering love for Him, and finding healing where despair once lived.
